Short story

But for now I would delight in the aroma while I prepared my eggs just the way I liked them.

Hmm you would think sitting at the kitchen table alone would seem out of the ordinary to me. Except on those few occasions he left to be with his brother he had sat across the table from me for the last twenty years or so. Wow had it been twenty..one..two..three…four…five. Twenty five years since my youngest had moved out. It’s a wonder I had tolerated his presence this long.

I couldn’t remember the last time I had eaten so well. Most of the food I had cooked over the last few years had been bland and tasteless. Cutting out most of the salt and seasoning from the food I prepared I was amazed to find that I even had any when I looked through the cupboards as I prepared my breakfast. We never went out to eat because of our budget and it wasn’t like those worthless kids of mine ever came and took us out for an anniversary or birthday. Most of the time they would send a gift certificate to a restaurant that wasn’t even in out area. I had a drawer in the kitchen full of them. Plus it wouldn’t be worth it having to help him in and out of the car each time. The long drawn out walk behind the hostess he would have make to get to the table as she checked behind her every few seconds to make sure we were still there. At bingo I had been used to it. I made sure to get there about fifteen minutes early and I always seated him in the section where the other men sat. At bingo I was allowed a break. I am sure that at the restaurant it would not have looked appropriate for me to have sat at another table.

Besides he would have never found anything he wanted to eat on the menu anyways. It was like in his old age along with taste buds the life had been sucked out of him. Well I guess I had been responsible for part of that. But you know what I meant. He had been like an infant. Worse because at least a infant is fun to look at even the ones that were not so cute at least you can stand to look at them. He had become disgusting to me. An infant even though they needed your help to do everything only weighed about eight to ten pounds. Though he had lost weight over the years did of course weigh a considerable amount more. A newborn, you know, will eventually become strong and become more independent over the years. I knew that things were only going to get worse over the years he would only become more dependant of me.

But you know what he wasn’t here now and for a little while I should try to enjoy my meal without thinking of him. I know that I had taken his life but he was my husband. I guess I should find some time to grieve for him. Try to remember a time when things had been good and maybe say a few words. But right now I was going to thank God for the solitude and the wonderful meal that was set before me.

The eggs were delicious. I can’t believe I had ever given up eating them any other way. Toast with butter. I know I probably shouldn’t be eating the butter because I don’t even know when it was bought. But I didn’t care. What did they say what doesn’t kill you only makes you stronger. I don’t know how old it was but it was delicious.

What was that sound? I hadn’t turned the TV on when I got up. No it wasn’t coming from the front room. It was coming from the back where the deep freezer was. I sat for a few seconds holding my breath waiting to hear it again. Nothing. Silence. Probably was the freezer it hadn’t been used in years maybe it was working the kinks out. Better go make sure it was working anyways. Never did check to see if it was getting cold after I had put him in earlier.

Yep it was working alright. He lay at the bottom of the freezer. Ice had already starting forming around his mouth were he a been drooling in his sleep. He didn’t look so comfortable though the space looked a little cramped. Well I wouldn’t be able to do anything about that now I guess I should have given it a little more thought when I first tossed him in. Maybe put in a pillow for his head. I should probably get him a throw blanket the one on the couch that he used at night before we got ready for bed. That way he would have something of his own.

The good new was the freezer was working. What if I had to buy another freezer there was only space for one and the delivery company would most likely try to take the old one or at least move it. Couldn’t have them wondering about the weight of a supposedly empty freezer.

I would get that throw blanket right after I finished my breakfast my coffee was getting cold.